What keeps them.

“In the perfect field someone has left everything including themselves. You. You should stay here.”
Walk with me to my favorite place… only we aren’t exactly walking and I am picturing a road trip, where the panoramic view of the landscapes and the sky are so beautiful. With my feet up on the dashboard and my curls flying freely with the wind, there was something on my face that wasn’t there before. So much time is spent pondering what could be and what wasn’t ideal, false hopes and faded memories. Little time is spent on actually enjoying the road up ahead and the consumption of happiness in that particular moment. During this road trip, we are driving up this curvy road with large houses, the ones with the little mailbox that is on the road, and the long driveways just to reach the actual house. But there is life there, its perfect, even serene. Then there was us, facing what we weren’t and what we were.
“People are mostly what they can’t keep and keeps them.”
Although at the core there is an animal lodged in each of us, our emotions are what makes us the people we are. How much you are willing to do? What are you leaving on the table when all is said and done? No regrets, and yet I look into your eyes and see so much left to say. Looking back, all the words left unspoken would have made more the difference, but it’s the words I never said that keep me.
“In the steam, on the mirror: you wrote so so so . . . so if you’re looking for answers you’re looking . . .”
You’re looking to dig beneath the surface. You are looking to stand on unstable ground and enter at your own risk. You are looking to conquer demons which never been woken or revisited but shoved underneath the carpet with hopes of one day being forgotten. You’re looking for me, and you are looking for answers. I was such a flawed individual back then, and remain not so perfectly put together now.
“Why does the sea hold what it loves most below?”
Like the road, like the house, there is a journey to reach a destination. As you are keeping me close, part of us are falling behind. Behind closed doors, behind all the words being said, you’re losing your voice and I am simply losing my mind. But that’s on the surface, because there are times that the smile on my face is not what I feel. But deep down, and below the sea, is life.


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